We have been married for six years, and we have thoroughly enjoyed our time as just a couple. We think our marriage is rare in that we know at every moment that we are loved and valued by each other. We’re able to be vulnerable and trust one another completely, which means we can deal with issues as they come up, which allows us to grow continually closer over time. We have waited to take on parenthood until we’ve felt sure we’re financially and emotionally ready for raising kids. Now that we’ve reached that phase of our life, we’re really excited about bringing a child into the close bonds we share!
As a couple, we are very affectionate, thoughtful, and quite silly! In fact, we revel in spending time being silly: making up stories and songs, making funny faces at each other, and giving each other silly nicknames. Sharing our silliness with a child is going to be one of the best things about parenting… at least until our child is 9 or 10, when we will start driving him or her crazy, but that will be okay, too. We'll never stop being silly.
Degree: PhD in Computer Science
Career: Inventor of mobile technology
Experience with kids: Baby-sitting, teaching Sunday School, teaching kids' classes at our gym
Favorite novel: The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle
Favorite movie: Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure
Favorite food: Cheese!
Listen to what in the car: This American Life or other podcasts
Next place you want to travel: Somewhere in South America
Game you like to play with kids: Tag
Favorite thing about wife: How snuggly she is
Hair: Auburn (sibs are all redheads!)
Degree: Bachelors in Sociology & Anthropology
Career: In school to be a lactation consultant
Experience with kids: Baby-sitting, working at elementary schools, teaching cooking classes for children
Favorite novel: Too many! The Red Tent is one.
Favorite movie: The English Patient
Favorite food: Tie between chocolate and asparagus (not at the same time, though!)
Listen to what in the car: Sing along with the pop, R&B, or country stations
Next place you want to travel: Alaska or Hawaii
Game you like to play with kids: MadLibs
Favorite thing about husband: His good heart
My Husband, Dan
I found Dan when I searched for my ideal guy within 60 miles on match.com; Dan popped up 59 miles away. I sent him a message, and he wrote me right back. But honestly, Dan is better than I knew how to wish. He’s gentle and genuine. He’s calmer, more cautious, and more introverted than I am, and that balances me out well. About eighty percent of the time, Dan and I are easy like Sunday morning, but when issues arise, I always know that Dan will listen, communicate, and work with me to improve things. Dan is extremely handy and is always willing to help me and others he cares about when the need arises.
Dan is amazing with children. Early in my relationship with Dan, I had a friend with a toddler over for dinner, and when Dan pretended to be a dinosaur and chased the giggling little boy around the house, I fell for Dan a little bit more. Children seem to naturally seek Dan out, often to use him as a jungle gym, so Dan often ends up sweaty and coated in kids yelling, “More! More!” at our parties.
Dan is also brilliant; he has a Ph.D. in computer science, and he works as an inventor for a mobile technology company. But his intelligence isn’t intimidating; he’s a humble and friendly guy. Plus, he has a terrible ability to remember things, so his head can’t get too big.
As our friends can attest, Dan gives the best hugs in the world In general, Dan’s snuggly nature is one of my favorite things about him. Another favorite thing is how he is never too self-conscious to be silly with me. I can’t wait to see Dan as a dad, because he’s going to be a natural.
My Wife, Sally
I think it’s the greatest thing in the world that I get to be married to my best friend. Before I met Sally, I hoped that I would one day fall in love, but I had no idea how incredible a relationship I would be in for. Sally and I are a great match in so many ways—one of the best things about our relationship is how easy it is. Whenever we have disagreements or have to talk about hard subjects, I know that she’s on my side and we will work it out.
One of Sally’s best qualities is her emotional awareness. She’s an incredibly empathetic person, and always keeps in mind how others will feel. It’s important to teach kids about their feelings—that it’s okay to feel sad sometimes, for example—and I know she’ll be a great role model.
Sally brings out the best in me. She supports me in all of my pursuits: from my ukulele practice (she’s very tolerant of my first musical instrument ever!) to photography to gardening, she always has encouraging words for my hobbies. Working on my Ph.D. was one of the hardest things I’ve done, but Sally was there with me 100%, not only proofreading my thesis but running the house, cleaning, cooking, and running all of the errands while I focused on my work. Thankfully, those times are over and we have a more balanced life now!
If you asked Sally’s friends what they consider her best quality, they would probably be evenly split between her kindness and her cooking! Sally often combines the two, cooking for people for fun or in times of need. No friend has a sickness, a move, or a baby without Sally coming to the rescue with homemade soup or a casserole. She’s an incredible cook—her friends are always ready with special requests, and many have only half-jokingly suggested she open a restaurant or bakery!
Sally will be an amazing mother. She takes care of me, her friends, her family, and the occasional complete stranger, so I know that she will be a natural when it comes to childcare. She’s organized, a great planner, and has really excellent common sense; and with all of these good qualities, she doesn’t take herself too seriously. Like me, our child will come to her to get food, comfort, help, and love, and I can’t wait to see it!